Five on Friday!

Linking up today with these fun girls! FRIDAY!

ONE

I'm loving the fact that my almost 4 month old is now sleeping through the night. Evans has been sleeping consistently 7:00pm-8:30am for over a week now! BUT, it was all in her swing... until last night! She FINALLY slept in her crib, and I'm totally thrilled beyond words about this! First time she has ever slept longer than an hour in her own bed without any tears. I know you mamas out there can relate to the complete awesome factor going on here- baby sleeping in her own room in her own bed all night long. HOORAY baby Evans!  

TWO 

I'm loving this weather lately! My oh my it's been a long cold winter in Atlanta. The snow was cool the first go round (minus the complete traffic nightmare it caused us here in the city), but the second go round and the ice storms that followed were not fun whatsoever. I'm happy to have some warmer days to get outside and soak in a good dose of vitamin D for a change. Even if it means pollen is upon us. Bring it!

THREE

My good friend Ann had her sweet baby girl yesterday! I'm so thrilled for her and Tyler. Can't wait to meet little miss Ellis. I know she and Evans are going to be the best of friends. Can't you see it? Evans & Ellis. Sounds like it could be a brand name. 

FOUR

I'm itching to bring out my paints again now that I have a little more free time with Evans sleeping so much better. I think it's about time I reopen the gallery. It's such a soothing hobby for me, and it's been way too long since I picked up my paint brush. I've still got a few paintings half finished from last summer... that's pretty bad. 

FIVE

I've been daydreaming lately about building a house one day... so this has led me to searching house plans. Did you know Southern Living has house plans? Holy swooning over here.

Happy Friday!

Things I Learned

Before I start rambling on, I want to say THANKS for all the sweet comments and emails on my headboard project. It was a big undertaking, which I figured out about halfway into the mess, and I'm happy with the results and hope that it inspires you to roll up your sleeves. If I can do it so can you! Now, where was I. Things I learned, or rediscovered, about myself this weekend. In just two days time. This is a deep post I tell you. Deep.

The movie GREMLINS. It came on TV over the weekend and as my hubby was flipping he said, "oh, I've never seen this." Of course being the 5 star wife that I am, I said, "ok, honey"...  knowing I'd be asleep in minutes. Gremlins. Thirty years later, and I still hate that movie. Now, with my admitted nerdville sci-fi obsession, love of all things dubbed cult classic, and my fascination with the 80's, you would think the combination would scream Gremlin territory. And yet, it falls way short. (I refuse to admit the maker of Jaws and E.T. had any part in this film. It's like Rocky V and Godfather III, which are not spoken words in our house). Those little fur balls are just weird. They aren't cute, and I find the Peltzer family annoying to this day. Modern Furby dolls oddly resemble the Magui I've tried to forget. In high school, my best friend's little sister had a Furby. I remember secretly plotting to suffocate that thing in its sleep. 

via IMDB, Gremlins- the movie

REO Speedwagon and Berlin. Keep On Lovin' You. Take My Breath Away. I realized this weekend that it's all but impossible for me to hear these songs and not prepare for my own little American Idol tryout. Those songs possess me. If you happen to be driving down the road along side of me and the radio plays one of these tunes, don't worry if it appears I'm being attacked by the sting of a thousand bees, what with the screaming and arms flailing about. (Unless of course it's the Jessica Simpson version, then I really am dying a slow death and you should call 911). It's quite possibly the best moment of my life up until that point. Don't be alarmed. Take my breath awaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

I love a clean house, but I hate getting it there. I know we all relate to this.. except of course Monica Geller. And possibly my mom. Seeing as neither live with me, I have to do it myself. My method this weekend was to play the two songs above on repeat while vacuuming, windexing and the like. It worked. Oh, and I threw in Journey, you know, for good measure. 

Spider spray smells really good, the homemade kind that is. After killing a man-size spider in my bedroom last week (I'm serious, he all but said to me "Hi, I'm Phil, from Chicago. I'll be moving in"). I stomped him out with my shoe several times, which is probably considered homicide in several states. At the very least, California. Anyway, have you seen the spray? You mix lavender oil, lemon oil, dish soap and water and spray the perimeter of your house inside and outside. Supposedly spiders don't like it. But I tell you, you will love it. It smells delicious! I used this recipe.

And finally, speaking of my bedroom, ever since we hung the headboard, my bed is the perfect little reading spot. After a long day at the office, I love to curl up in my pjs and flip through magazines. It's quickly becoming one of my favorite times of day, next to morning coffee.

Have you learned anything about yourself lately?

Friday Thoughts

Well, it's happened. I know it can happen to anyone, and no one is really ever safe. It's one of those things you see in movies, or on tv, or in the news, but you think surely will never happen to you. And yet, here I am, totally confronted head-on with this demon, and feeling completely powerless. I know the saying is to just-say-no and walk away, but how can I? I know my mama raised me better than this. I know my daddy would want me to be courageous. I know all of these things, and yet, here I am. Of course, I'm referring to that wicked evil temptress otherwise known to society as GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.

Known on the streets simply as GSC. 

IwentthroughhalfaboxofSamoaslastnight. There, I said it. Had to say it fast, like ripping off a band-aid  Please, judge me. I need the punishment. Hi, I'm Ashley, and I'm a girl-scout-cookie-aholic. Thank you, Ashley, welcome to group....What's wrong with me? Have I no self control? And how do they jam that much awesome into those tiny cookies? Magic, that's all I can figure. And possibly the use of laser beams.

Obviously, girl scouts have powers beyond any discipline I can muster. 

Every year around this time they control my thoughts and my wallet. At every Lowe's and grocery store around, there they are, taking their spots on the corner to wheel and deal. I can't avoid the corner. You know how it goes. Just one box, just one cookie. And once I'm there, I'm forever chasing that rabbit. It's never as good as that first time, and I need more and more. The gateway for me was Samoas. Then I had to get something harder. Thin mints, Tagalongs, Savannah Smiles...The corner kills. 

We all know the warning signs...

You started lying to the dentist. You don't know how those cavities got there.

You get defensive. I can stop when I want to, I just don't want to yet.

Your efforts at work plummet. You show up late, you leave early, or worse... you leave at lunch to have a quick cookie fix, and return on the job completely sugared.

You become isolated. Before long it's just you in an empty room with your Thin Mints and the curtains drawn, while your hand reaches over and over again to the box that was empty an hour ago. Curses.

You push away loved ones. "Come down for dinner honey! "..."I'm NOT HUNGRY, leave me alone!" you say from chocolate teeth.

You begin hallucinating. Weather man "It's going to be 70 degrees with a chance of THIN MINTS today".. what did he say? The wind outside clearly whistles thiiiiiiiiin miiiiiiiiints and haunts your sleep. 

You can barely get your shoes on without wondering where that next cookie will come from...

I guess I should finish up my boxes, you know, one last time. Then I'll quit, cold turkey. Maybe. In all seriousness, I love me some GSC. Go get some, because misery loves company.

Random Thoughts

OK, I have to post on this today because I sat down last night to watch the Bachelor and was annoyed, as usual.  Am I the only person in America that thinks these shows are CHEEEEEEEEEEEEESE fest?  Not to mention make the contestants look ridiculous in their quest for a man?  Seriously, the Bachelor completely devalues women and makes them look like pieces of meat in my opinion.  Is this seriously 2013 or 1840? I can hardly watch this show anyways without feeling embarrassed for everyone on it.  It's ridiculous. Have I said that?  Could you in real life go on a date with a guy you knew was dating about 30 other women, and you knew all of those women?  Um, no.

Nonetheless, the hubs and I will tune into these shows sometimes for comedic relief.  We will make bets during any given episode like *how long before the bachelor is seen shirtless, staring into outer space? *how many times will they jump off something into water? *how many times will they sit by a fire? *how many times will the words "this is real" and "i'm falling" be used? *how long before they dance before a live band?  etc.  The show is now so predictable and filled with unrealistic fluff that I don't know how anyone could take it seriously! That's just my two cents.  End rant.

In other news, the hubs had dinner with Jake Gyllenhaal last night. Ok, not with him per se, but at the table next to him.  They were at Optimist Restaurant here in Atlanta, which is apparently the place to be.  His boss snapped these pics of the actor with his blackberry, which explains the grainy image.  Pretty cool though, right?

And today is my niece Grayson's 2nd birthday! I cannot believe she is 2, I remember the day she came into this world, all blue eyed with a head full of dark hair.  I love her so! Her party was over the weekend.  It was an Elmo party, would you really expect anything less? We love you Gray-Gray!

cute cute cuuuuute Gray Gray

blowing out the candle

Elmo cupcakes made by my sis-in-law's-sister, follow that?

with Aunt Ash

I'm so excited!

with her dollhouse we got her

And today is ALSO my nephew Houston's birthday! Happy birthday buddy! We love you, too. Hope everyone has a wonderful Tuesday!

Dream Dinner Party

Hubs and I have strange conversations, often.  The most recent random from our Files of Weird was this question- Which 10 people (living) would you have at your dinner table, excluding yourself and spouse?  

The hubs list consisted of everything Hubs.  Braves, republicans, Tigers, Saved by the Bell, and of course, his favorite Andys (Stanley & Sheriff Taylor):

Bobby Cox, John Smoltz, Dale Murphy, George W., Kelly Kapowski (in character he noted, NOT Tiffani Amber), Danny Ford, Andy  Stanley, Jimmy Buffet, Neil Diamond, and one empty chair where Andy Griffith would have sat.  

Between our lists, we only had one overlap- I guess it is good that it happens to be our preacher?  My list includes some of my favorite Gamecocks- past and present- consisting of Ray Tanner, Marcus Lattimore, and John Abraham.  What's a dinner party without your Friends- Jennifer Aniston as herself, and Chandler Bing, in character.  Rounding out my invite only are US Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, my preacher Andy Stanley, and my HGTV ladies Candice Olson (who I would proceed to invite to move in with me), Sabrina Soto, and Monica Pedersen.   Ok, now how can I make this actually happen??

Now I really want to know, who would you invite? 

Best Movies and Worst Songs

Bells will be ringing and so forth, 'cause it's almost Christmas, y'all.  The season is upon us and all that jazz.  I've got my trees (we do fake trees because this girl is allergic to the real thing, and I'd like to live another day) all set up but not decorated yet. Hopefully I can hop to that this weekend while the hubs strings lights outside.  All the while listening to some holiday tunes.  I can tell you which songs will NOT be played.

The Worst Holiday Songs EVER List IMO

Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time

I mostly can't stand this one because it's so repetitive and gets stuck in my head.  Often.

Same Old Lang Syne

I think this song semi love story is meant to be touching and nostalgic.  It ends up being an annual annoyance. Running into an old flame makes you drop in tears in the rain, really?  Lame.

Grandma Got Run-over by a Reindeer

Wow.  Just wow.

My Grown Up Christmas List

I played this for hubs the other day because he hadn't ever heard it.  Bless him.  His first reaction was "Wait a minute, this is an adult going to see Santa?"  My thoughts exactly.  Santa makes toys.  He doesn't create world peace and end hunger.  Let's not give the old guy too much credit.

Christmas Don't Be Late

Sung not by soprano, not by alto, or even tenor, but chipmunk.  Chipmunk range is what we're going for here.  No thanks.

Mary Did You Know

Pretty sure she knew.

Thistlehair (the Christmas Bear!)

I love Alabama, and I love kids.  Anyone that knows me could tell you that.  But I have a real hang up with this song.  First of all, there is no Christmas Bear.  Period.  Don't try and steal the kid's magic show from Santa. Also, this song features children singing at the end, more like yelling, loud.  It makes my skin crawl, a lot.

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

These lyrics are just weird and awkward.  I think I'd die if I saw my mom kissing anyone when I was little, let alone if it wasn't my dad.  I certainly would not hang out to see any tickling like this child does. Creepy, even if it is just daddy dressed up.

...and anything covered by a boy band in the 90's.

that means you New Kids, *NSync, and Backstreet. 

What do y'all do to get in the spirit?  I love to watch Christmas movies and all the specials on TV.  I've got favorites that I have to watch each year, some of which aren't really "Christmas" but I like watching them at the holidays anyways.

The Best Holiday Movies EVER List, and random classics I watch in December

It's a Wonderful Life

Best movie ever?

White Christmas

You have no soul if you don't love White Christmas.  I secretly wish I could tap dance like that.  Ok, it's no secret.

A Christmas Carol- the 1984 version with George C. Scott

There are so many versions of this, but I think the Scott version really captures the Dickens story. Which, by the way, have you read the actual story?  It's darker and scarier than you think.

A Muppet Christmas Carol

The Muppets do everything right.

HOME ALONE (and only the original will do).  All year long, really.

Buzz, your girlfriend, WOOF.  What kid didn't want to be Kevin?

Charlie Brown Christmas

God bless them and their dying tree.

The Sound of Music

The hills are alive, and so is our house after an hour with Fraulein Maria.  You can count on the Houstons to belt out these tunes loud, often, and off key.

The Wizard of Oz

Not really a holiday movie, but we always watched it around Christmas when I was little.  My Meemaw loves this one.

The Santa Claus (I can't help it, I love that movie)

I got this movie along with my first tv for my bedroom growing up.  Oh, it was white.  A white tv with white remote.  I thought I was too cool.  Each time I watch this movie, I think about that old white tv, and how much I'm craving hot chocolate. 

....and no.... A Christmas Story is not making this list.  I rarely find it funny and always wind up depressed after watching it.  I'd rather shoot my eye out.

What's on your best and worst list?

Five Classics

Happy Halloween you ghouls and ghosts!  Here are my top five favorite "classic" movies.  Sure, there's a lot of Halloween-ish movies I love (Hocus Pocus and Halloween being two), but this list is just the older stuff that maybe you haven't seen, because you didn't grow up dorky loving a good scare like I did! 

5. 

 Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) 

I couldn't sleep for weeks after I first saw this.  Probably because I was so young.  Ok, I was 16.  Still, this is a creepy movie!  It's total creep-town to me that anyone could be a pod person.  Memorable quote: "I keep seeing these people, all recognizing each other.  Something is passing between them all, some secret.  It's a conspiracy, I know it."

4. 

Wait Until Dark (1967)

I know, I know.  Not technically a "horror" or "slasher" movie.  But, a really freakin' good one.  Starring Audrey Hepburn, no less, and I love her.  See it if you haven't.  It's a thriller for sure, and you will forget to breathe during most of it.  Memorable quote:  "You can have the doll!"

3.

Psycho (1960)

Duh, how could this not be on my list?  There's plenty of movies that have made me forever hate hotels, and showers, but this has to be the ultimate "I'll just stay home, with greasy hair" movie.   Memorable quote: "She might have fooled me, but she didn't fool my mother".

2.

Rosemary's Baby (1968)

I can't believe this movie made my blog.  I'm not kidding.  I don't even like to talk about this movie, but if we are going top 5 classics, it's in there, because it really messed me up for a long time.  And I only just recently watched it for the first time ever about 4 years ago.  I slept with the bathroom light on.  I will never EVER watch this movie again, it is that scary and disturbing.  I've never been one of those who can't leave a movie behind and realize it's just a movie.  Movies just don't stick with me like that.  But, my husband still enjoys picking on me for this movie, because it did stay with me.  Yuck.  No memorable quote here because I don't want to relive it. (yeah, I'm serious!)

1.

The Haunting (1963)

BEST scary movie of all time in my opinion.  And, one I can watch over and over and not need my light on. Ha!  Rent it if you haven't seen it yet.  And be sure to watch the original, NOT the remake (which is dreadful).  Memorable quote:  "Hill House has stood for 90 years and might stand for 90 more".

And that's it for my classic oldies but goodies! Have a safe and happy Halloween! 

Slashers & Surviving Them

It's the last weekend before Halloween, but there's still plenty of time to overdose on candy corn and watch a few classic boogeyman (or woman, as we'll see) movies.  But, before you get that popcorn popping, here are a few tips on how to survive.  You know, if ever in a Jamie Lee situation of your own.

HOW TO SURVIVE A HORROR MOVIE

1.  There are places that should be considered off-limits, always.  Even in daylight, avoid them.  Barns, basements, the garage, warehouses, the woods, the highway beside the woods, and through the woods to summer camp. And if you do happen to find yourself in the woods (dummy), you absolutely must avoid any structures you come across in there.  No, that old shack is not the best place to wait it out.

2.  Learn to not trust anyone, especially your neighbors or that popular kid at school.  It's every man for himself in a horror flick, and you'll live another day by not forming a group or a team.  

3.  Everyone knows this rule, mostly because it's one of the more important ones.  I 'll run over it briefly.  No sex or canoodling of any kind.  I actually wrote an entire English paper in college on the themes of sexuality in horror genre, the two are oil and water.  Best to avoid. 

4.  This one goes hand in hand with the above- no drugs or alcohol, ever.

5.  Go ahead and assume every urban legend is true and really did happen to that friend of a friend's friend down the street that one time (the only exception to rule #2).  It did take place and it will probably come to be again, so make like a ninja and get ready.  I will say when it comes to any legend or folklore or ghost story, this is the one instance in your survival guide where you need to throw common sense out and believe what you hear.

6.  Try using the phrase "I will not be right back".  Maybe reverse psychology works on boogeymen?  I've not seen this one tried, so maybe take this as more advisory commentary than rule of law.

7.  ALWAYS assume the absolute worst.  When the lights suddenly go out, or your phone is ringing off the hook, or the tv suddenly pops on white noise static, it's best to assume that no one is playing a trick on you.  Don't call out for your roommate or boyfriend, because they've likely already broken one of the above rules and are out of luck.  It's best to react in a very Samuel L. Jackson way with some sort of "oh hell no" comment and RUN.

8.  Which brings me to the next rule.  Never run up the stairs.  Come on. 

9.   I'm just going to repeat this- NO BARNS.

10.  If you haven't been able to follow any of the above rules, and do happen to confront the boogeyman, please note they have a keen ability to play dead.  You'd be best served taking a tip from our friends at The Walking Dead.  Decapitation is mandatory.  And whatever you do, do NOT bury the body with the head.  They can make like a lizard and grow back together.  

11.  Aside from Freddy-like villains, boogeymen are really predictable creatures.  Annoyingly so, but you can use this to your advantage.  They are often times slow moving,  so use your speed and agility to run like the wind (preferably not into the woods, up the stairs, or into a barn).  They are almost always emotionless, so don't try and reason with or talk to one.  And, they use weapons that can only be used in hand-to-hand combat.  Knives, chainsaws, ropes and the like can't inflict much pain if you do the above and RUN.  Seriously, Jason has never reached for his 22, and Michael Meyers isn't packing any heat either.

12.   Boogeywomen, on the other hand, are not as predictable.  I don't have any great suggestions on how to deal with the Carries and Samaras.  If you hear any talk of these ladies in your town, rule # 5 tells you to believe it, and rule #12 should be to go ahead and book your flight to the Bahamas until the coast is clear.  (But not during the off-season, and don't go by yourself, because you may have an I Still  Know What You Did Last Summer situation on your hands).

13.  Summon your inner-slayer, if you have time, and train your butt off.  Buffy wasn't just born with those mad skills.  She trained tirelessly, setting aside cheerleading and popularity to rid the world of vamps.  The Hellmouth and Sunnydale are forever grateful.  So get to the gym, now (but not an abandoned gym after hours, and don't take up water aerobics as your get-fit strategy- see Swimfan, The Faculty, Jennifer's Body).

14.  Avoid social events at all costs.  These include high school football games, prom, trick-or-treating, and in some cases, circuses and the state fair.            

15.  Your house phone and cell phone are not going to work.  Don't bother trying for that 911 call.  Even if you do get the call through on one random bar of service, the operator is only going to hear choppy static on the other end.

16.  Don't babysit.  

17.    And finally, my last tip.  This is the best advice on how to avoid a slasher all together.  The moment you realize there's a problem, whether it be in the news or via town gossip, leave town immediately.  Change your zip code and your name.  Never look back or speak of it again. 

GOOD LUCK!   

Football Girls in the South

OK, a friend of mine sent me these this morning and I thought- wow that's so true.  The culture of football in the south, especially among us women, and more precisely us SEC girls, is pretty spectacular.

While I'm not all of the  "real women watch football" mentality, I have to admit that I've been following my Gamecocks since a very young age, and my parents are to thank (blame?).  And seeing as I don't really enjoy cooking (like at all), this one made me crack up...

And this one is the absolute truth, at least at South Carolina.  We have to look cute while questioning the play book and screaming out our Saturday profanities (my hubs looked at me sideways last Saturday when I actually yelled out "FINISH HIM!" during the LSU game, oops).   It's a delicate balance southern girls execute to pearl-wearing high heeled perfection.   

And lastly, yes...  College football is a religion in the south.  We meet regularly (every Thursday or Saturday, depending on the week) at a holy place (the stadium) and have a religious experience (the game's outcome).  Oh, and do I really need to mention the amount of prayer involved here?   

So, if you're fortunate enough to be a woman of the south, you know that football has forever changed your life.

Happy Friday

I came across this inspirational quote the other day, and it really hit home with me.  I always wish I had started something and kept up with it so that I could be presently enjoying the benefits.  Whether that be saving money, eating better, working out, or spending more time with family, there's always some goal that starts out strong (like say just after New Year's Day) and fizzles out.  But, we always wish we had stuck with  it, whatever it may be.  

So, I started to think.  What in a year from now will I really wish I had started doing TODAY?  For me, it's saving money.  It's not that we spend a lot by any means, because we really don't.  I pride myself and my husband on being pretty money cautious and budget friendly.  But, there's always more you can do, right?  So, what can I do now that I'll be SO glad I started doing in 365 days? An automatic savings plan.  Check! I've signed myself up to save X amount of dollars from every pay check.  It automatically rolls into my savings account, so it is like it was never there to begin with.  By setting it up for automatic transfer, I won't be forced in a tempting situation to "skip just this month".  So, Sept. 2013, we'll see if I was able to stick to this.  

What will you wish you had started today in a year from now? 

Annoying Work Habits

Thank God it's FRIDAY, because sometimes I cannot take the little pet peeves I've run into over the years  in corporate America.  We all have work pet peeves, and I've compiled a list of them.  If you are guilty of any of these annoying work habits, shame on you!

1. Speaker Phone

Speaker phone- greatest invention since sliced bread?  Yes, except to everyone else around you while in use.  Granted, I know there are times when it's absolutely necessary (a long conference call, several people listening in, meetings, etc.).  But, annoying Speaker Phone Guy uses it not out of necessity, but for want of human decency.  The office doesn't need to hear your personal phone calls, and we definitely don't need to hear the phone dialing and ringing off the hook.

2. Smacking Gum

Not a lot to be said here, just don't do this.  And don't pop your gum either.  Nails on chalkboard.

3. Loud Typing

This one actually doesn't bother me as bad as it does others, but it really perplexes me.  I've often wondered how Loud Typer Guy gets to those decibels.  They must wear heavy rings that weigh down their fingertips, right?  Or perhaps acrylic nails are heavier than they were when I donned them for high school prom.  Yes, the nails must be made of lead nowadays.  Only explanation for the booming rat-a-tat-tat produced by a measly10 fingers.

4. Microwave Related No-nos

I could spend ALL day here.  Exploded meals.  Fish reheats.  Thai.  Curry.  The I-take-20-minutes-to-cook-frozen-dinner.  Are you kidding me?

5. The Gunner

I must say, I do have a soft spot in my heart for the Overachieving Work Slave Guy.  It's adorable, isn't it?  Their swan dive into ambition is one for the books.  Always early, knows every answer about everything, and always volunteering... for everything.  God bless the gunners, and all of us who work with them.

6. Clipping Nails

I actually haven't had to encounter this one, but I've heard the horror stories.  Clipping your nails outside of the privacy of your own bathroom is actually a federal offense punishable by death.  Plus, I'm pretty sure it's the cause of rabies.

7. Heavy Breathing

Sometimes this person makes me want to ask if they are alright, or just needing some attention.  I've worked with about a handful at different places over the years, and it's interesting how many variations of heavy breathing are out there.  There's the Whistler who inhales deeply and exhales through the cracks of his teeth, creating a nice little 'ttssss' every few seconds.  There's Mega Grunter who exhales past what I can only gather to be nostril rocks.  There's Outta Breath who takes the breaths of a marathon runner.  And lastly, there's Coughing Guy.  In my experience, this is usually the one you want to give medical attention, as each exhale sounds like a smoker's lung.  (note- these are all men, I've never actually worked with Heavy Breather Girl, but these probably do exist.)

8. The Belcher

Ahh, yes.  Mr. Fizzy Lifting Drink Sampler Guy.   I've seen many of these over the years.  The best are those that follow each burp with a "Oh, WOW, excuse me."  Dude, I don't need that each time you burp, which to qualify for The Belcher category is more than 10 times in a work day.  Also, the hiccup burpers.  The Hiccurpers if you will.  Honestly, what horrible things are they eating and drinking to make so much air beg for escape?

I don't really want to know.

9. The Serial Socializer

If I'm in my office, door shut, eyeballs high in paperwork, it is probably not a good time to tell me about your daughter's school play.  Don't you love Serial Socializer that doesn't take a hint when to come back later? Haha.  Of all the annoyances in the office, this is probably the one I hear about more than anything else.  So-and-so won't leave me alone, so-and-so needs more work to do.  So-and-so is in my office again.  I feel all of your pain, I've dealt with the Too-Gossipy Gal, too.

10. The Self-proclaimed Martyr

For me, this one just takes the cake.  You know this type.  Usually the one that rolls the eyes when asked to do a job task (which is normally actually part of their employment function and skill set).  Usually the one to let out a loud huff (also could fall under the Heavy Breather category, double whammy!)  each time the office phone rings.  And, usually the one seeking praise and justification at each corner for his/her commitment to the job.  In that respect, I do agree with the Self-Proclaimed Martyr that we should all receive medals for showing up five days a week and doing our jobs.


Oh, work, and all the people you get to surround yourself with.  Ha!  Isn't it lovely?  :)  Have a great LONG weekend everyone!

Hubby Says (or reasons I laugh daily)

Before I married who is now my husband, I thought I was a pretty funny lady.  Not like slap your knee, gasp for air funny, but I always considered myself to have a good sense of humor.  It wasn't until I met my hubs that I realized I, in fact, am not the wittiest person ever.  So, today I give you the best of the best from the vault of Hubby Sayings (or at least the ones I can remember).  In no particular order of hilarity.  Enjoy.


Hubs' response to me worrying about Carolina beating Alabama, few years ago:
"If the Nerds can defeat Alpha Beta, if Daniel-san can defeat Johnny Lawrence, if Rocky can defeat Drago, and if the Goonies can defeat the Fratellis... you guys will be fine."  (he was right by the way, SC killed Alabama that year).


Me to hubby: "What's it like to be tall like you?  I wish I were taller."
Hubs: "Oh, you wouldn't want to see the things I see up here."


Me:  "If you could have a different name what would it-"
Hubs interupts: "Zack Morris Houston."


In traffic one day, slighty ticked off, and very much strangling the wheel:
"Freaknik, Dogwood Festival, Sweetwater 420 Fest, and the Braves and Hawks both at home.  Get me OUUUUUUUT of this city!"


One day, trying to park at the always ridiculous Lenox, pedestrian runs out in front of our car, only to slow to a speed of snail, wearing an Ed Hardy shirt:
"Oh, no, you go right ahead sir.  Wouldn't want to hit you in that shirt, it's worth more than my car."


Me, asking about his high school mascot:
"Bearcat, that's like a mountain lion or something?"
Hubs, appalled, "Um, it's much fiercer."


Hubs bought a crabcake from Kroger, ate it, and gags out "Ugh, if I were that crab, I'd be embarrassed."


And this one from the sleep-talking files:
Hubs rolled over in a dream-like state early one morning, slurred through a sleep coma "Captain Planet really was a hero", rolled over again, and back to dreamland he went.  He swears this didn't happen.  I promise you- it did. (gonna take pollution down to zero....)

And this one from the hubby-haircut files:
Hubs hair is thick and requires a cut about every 2.5 weeks, hence the nickname news-anchor-hair.
Me: "You get a haircut yet?"
Hubs:  "No, I'm live at 6 tonight.  Barometric pressure, a local school getting new computers, upcoming roadwork on 285, and a water skiing squirrel.  You know, local news kinda stuff."


And then there is this one.  Quite possibly the most in depth conversation ever had surrounding the hit 90's show Saved by the Bell.  Yes, this is my marriage.  A summary:
Bayside High- public or private?  Our conclusion- public. For three reasons.  1) Kelly Kapowski attends (see prom episode, dad loses job, Kel's forced to bring in waitress money to save the family).  2)  Slack security.  No way Valley's on-campus pranks would be successful in a private setting.  And, 3) Zack and the 1502.  Last time I checked, that's not a possible score.  Obviously a public high school error.

Followed by a later email from hubs:
"I haven't been able to let this go.  Bayside must be public.  Private school wouldn't have its prom in the gym.  Also wouldn't have such low-rent talent as Jesse and Slater supply the entertainment.  Furthermore, NBC would probably choose a public school to host Johnny Dakota's PSA about drug use.  Private schools tend to have more pot-smokers.  Third, look at the A/V resources at Bayside.  They manage to provide equipment to film commercials for Buddy Bands and Zack's run at Student Council prez, but when the video camera gets busted, the gang has to trick an undercover Air Force agent into thinking Screech is an alien to scratch out the cash for a replacement.  Finally, Slater is the only one that has a car.  That means the others have to take a bus or get a ride somewhere.  Considering they're always visiting each others' houses, they must live within walking distance.  May be a stereotype, but private schools usually draw students from all over the place... and they usually have cars."


And, finally, here are the most recent emails I received from hubs, filled with his angry thoughts on Karate Kid and Wheel of Fortune.  Yes, these are things he gets upset about.  God bless him.

"The yellow car Daniel chooses from Miyagi's lot is a pansy-mobile.  I know they're different in southern California, but when Ali (with an i) sees him cruising around Golf 'n Stuff, do you really think she would be blown away by this macho muscle machine convertible that was painted with leftovers from a kid's nursery?  Daniel already has a 98 lb weakling image problem after getting pummeled by Johnny and the Cobra-Kais.  Any other car would've been better.  The local hooligans in Reseda would have that lemon covered in graffiti the first night he parked it at that crappy apartment complex.

And, I know we've covered this before, but really Ms. Laruso?  You move across country for a job in waitressing because you'll never make that kind of money in computers?"


"The Wheel is totally bogus.  As someone who attended tryouts once at Turner Field, I can confirm that all they care about is getting contestants that will clap like morons and smile even when they Lose a Turn or land on Bankrupt.  Merv Griffin does not care about recruiting the best talent to compete.  I consider myself a Wheel of Fortune purist.  Just give me 1 chance Merv.  I'll make you proud.

And, why are people buying a bunch of vowels? It just costs them money and shows more of the board to the other 2 players.  You've got 1 thirty-minute segment of your life to rack up all the prizes and cash possible, and you want to spend 200 bucks for an 'E' because you know one word is 'THE'?  Bush league."



Hope this brought you some laughs today.  (and possibly a new mindset on 80's and 90's television?)  

Bring on Fall

Fall.  It's amazing how a season arguably known for its change can equally embrace tradition.  The summer heat slumbers, the cool air dances its way in, and the lush green we once knew retires to autumn's recognizable amber, gold, and maroon.  For many of us, it's a time of year that's nostalgic.  It's a time of year that brings to mind football games and homecoming.  It brings to mind the start of so many nervous first days of school.  It brings to mind family gatherings and all things pumpkin spice.  It brings to mind the excitement of holidays past, and the ones yet to come.  I'm not sure if it's the change of colors, the change of temperature, or the change of time, but fall invites you to not only reflect, but also to appreciate what's in store.  

My first football game.  Mom 8 months-ish pregnant with me at Williams Brice Stadium, 1983. 

1985

Carolina/Clemson 2007

Save the Date cards, 2008

Carolina v. Auburn, 2010

Thanksgiving, 1993

First Thanksgiving at our house, 2011

My birthday after passing the bar exam, 2010

More birthdays, Grayson (2011), Lily (2012)

First fall in our home, maple tree changing colors, 2011

A getaway to Grove Park Inn, 2010

Gray's first Halloween, our house, 2011

Snow at my parents house, and my precious little Belle 2010

I am so ready for fall! 

If Dogs Were Rooms

Lately, my life has been absolutely consumed, yes, consumed, with puppy time.  Hubs and I have been puppy-hood'n it since we brought the little fur ball home with us.  From learning how exactly to raise a family member that isn't our own species, learning to sleep less, learning to deal with chewing more, and loving Blakely all at the same time, we have grown a lot.  I know people with dogs and/or children understand that.  When you go from just the two of you to an actual alive responsibility, um, stuff changes.  Fast! I realized I haven't been updating my blog or decorating my house hardly at all since Blakely came into the picture.  She's kinda been priority.  :)

I thought today I'd combine my two loves, interior dec and Blakely... errr just dogs in general for this post.  One of my favorite shows is Dogs 101 on Animal Planet.  It is so interesting to learn about different breeds and what they are bred for, what they are known for, and how they would measure up within your own family.  I started thinking, I wonder if dogs could be rooms in your house, what that room would look like? Would it be comfortable, bright, rustic, traditional, messy ( hehe ), tidy, subdued?  Well, after brainstorming something I'm sure no one has ever actually even thought of (yes, this is how my mind works), here goes...

Golden Retriever

Have you ever met a golden that wasn't happy?  Goldens are known for their friendly and exuberant nature, which makes them one of the most popular family dog choices (right next to my next category, the lab).  Goldens love to please and are eager to be around people, which makes a cheerful and welcoming living room ideal for my choice on this pup.  Plus, goldens love to exercise, and need about an hour of good exercise every day according to Dogs 101.  Hence the bike and running shoes.   

Labrador Retriever

Ahh, labs.  Aren't they great?  I can't believe I'm saying that and I have a lab puppy (those of you who've had lab puppies understand where I'm coming from! so cute, so much work, so worth it).  Labs are water dogs, with webbed paws, originally bred for their skill in hunting game and, you guessed it, retrieving fishing nets.  Like the golden, labs are part of the sporting dog category.  They also are friendly and devoted, and are eager to please.  Labs need to be around family members.  A rustic, relaxed lake house living room is definitely what my Blakely would be if she were a room.  She'd love to chew up all that rustic wood in real life, too. :)

Poodle

The poodle.   Most people don't know, but poodles are also water dogs.  The great thing about poodles is that they don't really shed, however instead of the fur coming off, it becomes tangled and matted, which means the poodle demands a good cleanin' and groomin'.  When I saw this frilly and girly bathroom room, I immediately thought poodle.  No, not immediately, I'm not that crazy y'all.  But in doing the research for this blog post, I thought it to be a good fit.  The water room where we groom and clean.

Dachshund

Dachshunds were originally used to scent and flush out badgers and rabbits.  But, let's face it, not so much anymore according to most of the people I've talked to who own their own little "wiener" dogs.  My friend Michelle has two, and she says they are loyal and devoted companions who just want to snuggle and burrow into pillows and blankets.  After talking to Michelle, I knew a bedroom was it for this breed.  A cozy, long & narrow setting, filled with blankets and pillows.  Plus, dachsunds' coats can range from red-orange, tan, light beige, black, and even silvery gray, making this room's color palette a perfect match. 

Dalmatian

I'm not going to post about this breed, I think this room is self explanatory why it's Dalmatian-firehouse-esque.

St. Bernard

Onto the extra-large working dog class, the St. Bernard.  Have you ever seen one in real life, they are massive.  The size of a small zebra or leopard.  Actually, bigger than that, ha ha.  Due to their large size and weight and extreme strength, St. Bernards were originally bred for rescue.  Aww.  They are so cute, I would bet they are still rescuing families, only in a different way.  St. Bernards were ranked in the top 10 for laziest dogs, doesn't that make you snicker a bit?  I can totally see these big guys just lounging around a bedroom all day (while chewing up your shoes). 

Westie (and Jack Russells, for that matter)

Onto one of my favorite mid-size breeds, the westie!  Aren't they so adorable?  This breed is known for its active nature and high social habits.  In other words, these little cuties love to play, play, play! And they will do it all day long, too.  Which is pretty fitting when I think about the westies I've come in contact with in my life.  One in particular, my friend Strass' dog Bailey.  I really do think he would run around until he passed out (and I'm sure Strass would tell you he does, and often).  Westies love toys (and they can be quite possessive of them), they love to play games, and they love to chase.  So, if a westie were a room, that buddy would definitely be a bright and colorful play room filled with hours of entertainment.

And that's a wrap for this silly little post.  I hope you enjoyed! What room in your house would your dog be?  Woof!

(all pictures are from Pinterest)